As a nation, we’re not good at talking about money. But money underpins almost everything we do – we need money to support our everyday lives and to achieve the goals we have for the future.
Because money is deemed to be so important, it is almost inevitable that money problems can cause financial stress, impacting our health, wellbeing and even our relationships. Money issues, whether they are yours or those of someone you care about, will often affect more than your wallet – they can affect the way you live your life.
In the past, the idea of experiencing financial difficulties may have been considered shameful and discussions about money woes were strictly taboo. Too often, cases arise of people following in their parents’ footsteps for example by accumulating excessive debt or not talking about getting help with money problems. Thankfully, talking about money is gradually becoming less of a ‘no-go’ area – information and support is more readily available and money issues might naturally form part of day-to-day conversation, but there is still a lot more that can be done.
Not talking about money can cause real issues, for example with older people, insufficient planning for their financial future can mean urgent issues crop up with family members being unprepared – not knowing what their wishes are or how they would like you to deal with the situation. Research in 2019 by Remember a Charity found that 68% of UK adults do not have a will – that’s the equivalent of 27.8 million people – around 40% of the UK population. And less than 4 million people (less than 6% of the UK population) have set up a power of attorney which allows someone you care about and trust to manage your affairs should you become unable to through accident or illness.
Whatever the case may be, finances need to be talked about, and being willing to initiate these conversations can really help. The thought of tackling these issues head on, or of raising the topic with a loved one, can be intimidating, but it is important to do it. It will always help for you to plan and prepare your conversations in advance. Below is a handy conversation guide to help you:
Preparing for the conversation:
- When to talk – no distractions
- Where to talk – neutral place
- Practise the conversation
During the conversation:
- Be mindful of emotion
- Try not to interrupt
- Keep to the topic at hand
- Think about help and support
After the conversation:
- Acknowledge the conversation happened
- Agree how you will move forward
- Write down any actions or agreements
The more we open up and talk about money - even the really difficult conversations - the better our lives and relationships will be.
Read our other blogs in the Talk Money Week series: